There were laughs and tears, happiness and fears

What an utterly emotional morning. The alarm went off this morning and as usual, the cat and I made our way into the bathroom to get ready. Due to the heat, she has been shedding like crazy and so when she started hacking, I averted my gaze to give her some privacy, except the next sound was not that final hair ball noise, but silence. And when I looked over, my cat was lying on the ground, not moving. As I moved towards her, calling her name, she kind of came to but was lethargic, breathing in a wheezy, panting, odd sound and then peed herself. My cat has shown her displeasure by leaving brown gifts in various places when we have been away for too long, but never has she peed outside of her litter box without being sick. So needless to say, I started freaking out inside. I rubbed her throat thinking maybe something got stuck and after a few more minutes, she rose and left the room. She was still panting, but the weird sound was gone and she was reactive. She went down the stairs as D and I debated what to do. About 10-15 minutes after the incident, she was fine. She was reacting normal, responsive, we gave her food and she ate. And then we took her first thing to the vet to find out what the heck.

After a round of testing or two, after many tears, the blood work came back saying she was pretty normal. Her blood sugars were high – but considering the stress and the fact that I wasn’t sure if she was going into shock or not and so gave her some corn syrup, that was not unexpected. A couple things were borderline low, but nothing to be worried about. The urinalysis showed high levels of glucose and bacteria. That is a bit of a worry. So more tests are being run and I am at home keeping an eye on her. Thankfully, my boss has been really understanding; we ran through some numbers and ideas on the phone. I did a couple of hours of work to make sure the project I am leading is continuing without me.

I am exhausted now though. I wasn’t awake more than 5 minutes when it happened and I have been running on stress all morning. I really want a nap, which my smart cat is doing at my feet. My horoscope said it was a day to just step back, so this is me stepping back for the moment. I have been putting in all these hours at work and this morning I was thinking how maybe I just haven’t been around enough and missed all the signs. It’s my fault my poor kitty is not well. With all the stress I have been under and her being so sensitive to my feelings, no wonder she was feeling ill. She’s showing me what I am doing to my own body. So I need to figure out how to bring less stress home and I need to be home more. Just one more week and my part of the project is done for a couple weeks. I really need that time off. And so does my kitty.

I am glad that she is probably okay and it was just a one off situation. Fingers crossed. But it just adds to my underlying worry. She’ll be 16 this year. She’s been diabetic for 6 years. She is losing weight, which is good. But I worry about at what expense. Is there something we are missing? Is there something I should be doing more of? She has been very clingy all day – really staying near me. It’s sweet and I do love her so much. Maybe she just needs some security herself and being by me provides that. I’m sure if it scared me, then it scared her just as much.

Anyway, I think it’s a good time to take an afternoon nap and then I can get back to work and chores. First things first – naps101.