Ain’t that the truth

I like the look of agony
Because I know it’s true

Emily Dickinson

Winter is coming… how do I know? I am in hibernating mode, which means mentally I am starving ALL the time. I don’t feel like cooking, but put a bag of chips in front of me and there is a large part of me that just wants to inhale the entire bag. I just want carbs! Thankfully, I have had the willpower to resist thus far. The cat on the other hand is driving me nuts with her craving of more food. She keeps emptying her bowl and then talking up a storm as soon as you get near the kitchen.

In other news, life is pretty much the same as always, just busier. It seems that all of my friends have decided that September is a good month for get togethers. The long weekend was spent prepping for the Betty Cup (costume buying, costume making, sewing, fixing, etc.), a fabulous dinner with A&J ( I don’t know what they do, but when they cook, I love eggplant and zucchini), the Betty Cup (D won again), the club house afterwards and then d&d on Sunday. Let’s just say I was exhausted by the time the weekend ended. I also hurt my back (not telling how) and so I missed work Tuesday. Thank goodness though since this week it was pick on me. On Thursday alone, I was yelled at 4 times and called a ‘fat, ugly pig’ followed by several swear words afterwards. I got off easy since supposedly she suggested that other co-workers go masturbate each other and tweak each other’s nipples. And this week was NOT the full moon.

This weekend was quieter, but not really. Friday I went out with J to a games night, then off to pick up A and dinner at Denny’s. Denny’s – one word to describe - unsatisfying. There was nothing healthy on the menu – I don’t even think there was anything on the appetizer list that wasn’t deep fried. Not a salad in site and not a payphone around. It was great company for the food, which was very thankful. Saturday, I bribed milady to come with me to Scrapfest (supposedly to be my ‘no’ woman – she didn’t do so good at slapping my hands though – heehee). That was fun and again, my willpower was tested. I actually spent just outside of my budget which I feel was really well done and I got some really nice stuff, so if I get off my procrastinating arse soon, some friends may get some really cool Christmas gifts. Heehee. Last night was slow, D and I watched the rest of Little Miss Sunshine (we were watching it in stints) which was good, and then Flushed Away (which rocked – totally hilarious). Today was also slow and I did some odds and ends shopping. I got some Christmas gifts (I know, I am sick) and some Halloween props, some medication for a certain sickie, and some filters for the furnace.

Yes, I actually turned on the furnace this weekend. And I wouldn’t have, except D is sick and whiny and I knew that if the house was cold, I wouldn’t hear the end of it. Even milady noticed my house was cold. I personally was enjoying it as last night (the first night with the furnace) I threw off all my covers at one point cause I was dying of heat. Again, I know, I am one sick puppy. Heehee.

Tonight I watched Marie Antoinette – it could have been a really good movie, except the music didn’t fit in at all and the ending was totally anti-climatic. It gets to a decent point of history and it just ends and the final shot is just so useless. They could have stopped with them in the carriage and it would have made much more sense as an ending. The acting was fine, but modern music doesn’t fit in a period piece, especially such horrible renditions of modern music.

All the library books have been returned and I am back to reading my very extensive collection of books needing to be read. I started with a pile that has been in a cupboard for at least 6 months. There were 5 books and I almost finished reading the third book thus far. There is one that I don’t think I will finish reading. I think I will put it in my pile of to be reads and maybe I will get back to it, but it is just not capturing my interest. I have tried reading it at least 4 times already and am only about 30 pages into the book. Oh well. Thankfully, I get a magazine that reviews books for me, so I find that I am collecting less books, though more are series. The bonus of my library run was that I found some really cool videos to work out too. I even managed to find them for a really good deal at HMV West Ed. I could either buy 4 for $29.95 or each one for $26.95. Guess what I paid? There is one more from the series that I would be interested in buying at a later date, but these 4 should do me.

And I have doing some odd jobs around the house. Things that have been left cause they weren’t important but bug me every so often. That has also been good. I love fixing things and decluttering stuff.

It has been rather weird lately for mood. I vary between anxious and boredom. I feel like I am searching for something, like I am on the cusp of something different and while that is exciting, I am also really afraid of what is coming. I want the change, but what if I can’t handle it? It doesn’t scare me that it may be hard going, but I guess it is what comes next. Will the next plateau satisfy me for while or will I need more? Am I on a quest to conquer or find myself? Is it just career or is it everything from the physical to spiritual? And all the music playing in the background while I write this is all thought provoking and depressing. Sheesh. No wonder I am getting all deep. Heehee.

So I am looking at an ad for Arm & Hammer’s new detergent and it says it is Biodegradable in 28 days. All I can think is how much damage it will do in those 28 days and where will it end up. 28 days is a long time and goodness knows, lots can happen in just 4 weeks. But that is my pessimistic optimism talking.

I really want to do something involving some girlfriends and a spa treatment. I would love to spend some time at a spa, relaxing, getting pampered and catching up with the girls. Unfortunately, most of my friends, like myself, are not exactly rolling in the dough so we can squander a pretty penny at a spa. It would be nice though. Sighhh.

Anyway, that’s all I have for tonight. I need some sleep. Everyone around me is sick and I would like to avoid catching it. Plus, who doesn’t love sleep.

To sleep perchance to dream.