2011: Memory Lane
Following my tradition, it is that time of year to review the last year and ponder all that has occurred – good, bad, fugly, and the rest.
The office reno is complete. This is a very good thing. While there are still a few things that need to be added – upper cabinets – overall, I am very pleased to be able to use this room again.
The water seepage turned out to not be a horrible event. This was also very good. I was worried about how much we were going to have to spend/do in order to rectify this problem. But it was rather affordable and though it took up too much time, I am glad I can use the room and not have to devote thousands of dollars to redoing it. But… I am not putting the books back in until spring when I can confirm it has truly been fixed.
This means the other reno I wanted to do – the roof – was not done. But we found a really good company that we like and hopefully in 2012, we will complete this reno.
Work – I believe I told my boss this week that the only constant in my job right now is change. We are going through so much right now that I am just trying to hang on. I appreciated this past week and being able to get through some of my emails and start the training I need to get done. I just don’t understand where the higher-ups are coming from. I feel like they really have no clue. The training I need to do – I got access Dec 14, but not the software until the 15th. I was told on the 15 that this was not a priority for my boss, but I am supposed to be using the training on Jan 3rd. The first 2 courses took 2 hours each. The next two took an hour each. I have a total of 67 courses, which means I have 63 left. And these are just the basic training. There is another 20 or so courses I have to take afterwards. Oh My Goodness!
Plus – work is basically virtual. While my colleague is superb, I totally adore her and we get along; she is located elsewhere. It makes it tough being alone in the office. The boss is located elsewhere. This is new for me. I feel left out of my old unit since I no longer work with them. Plus, they are going through change. We are rather stressed out and burning out and I cannot do anything to help them anymore. I can’t do what I need to do.
Health-wise, 2011 was better than last year. I joined the pcn group and the good news is I am back doing what I wanted – losing weight and getting healthier. There have been ups and downs in this journey this year. I mostly like my dietician; we are similar in some aspects, but I still am not getting what I want out of her. The exercise specialist is good and is very excited for me. I get to start January with a circuit that he is creating. I am hoping that will help. I still love and hate the calorie counting. I get it; I really do. It is frustrating, annoying, and time consuming. I don’t have a phone with apps, which might make things easier. I do it in writing and search online for anything I can’t figure out. I am exercising regularly. I am making myself take breaks at work. I have lost thirty pounds and twelve and a half inches. That makes me very happy.
Medical wise – it has been a trying year for me. I have hurt myself pretty much every month. From dizziness at the start of the year to dislocating in September and then really bad scrapes and hurts in December. Thankfully, only September had me in the hospital, but oy! I seriously hurt each of my little toes this year, which has made shoes interesting. I have pulled my back and neck and I have tested my immune system often this year.
Following this though – I got my first professional massage this year and have continued with it. We have now moved from weekly to every three weeks and hopefully soon to once a month. I also got my first manicure and pedicure. While enjoyable, I was also annoyed with how much time I spent fixing things afterwards. My hands and feet and nails have benefited from the attention (and the paraffin and massage), so we’ll see if this becomes a regular event. Rumor has it we are doing this again in January.
Family – my brother and SIL are expecting. Whoot! First grandchild for my parents expected at the end of January. Still not feeling like I know her very well, which sucks. I really like and get along with my brother; so I assumed I would really like his wife. I wasn’t expecting best friends, but I was expecting friends. Instead, I don’t even know. I just don’t feel like she makes an effort and I am tired of dragging things out of her to try to learn about her. We’ll see if motherhood brings out the best in her, though based on her recent statements, I can see this not going well. My parents are doing better. They seem to be enjoying things for the most part. They have plans for travel, which hopefully will get them back in time for the birth of their grandchild. They are both working and while mom is scheduled for surgery in February, I am hoping everything goes well.
Friends – The drama, the excitement, the sadness, the love. There have been some breakups, some deaths, some happy events, and through it all, I am often reminded how good my friends are. I did get out more, at least, until I started calorie counting. That has hurt my involvement in things more than anything else. I have to be careful when I got out and where and what do I eat. I have made some good choices and some bad ones. It adds to the frustration and I get tired of explaining why I am not responding to dinner suggestions or why I seem to be busy.
I have still spent a majority of the year alone. As much as I try to get out, it is tough. There are friends I want to see more. There are friends who want to see me more. I have been horrible on email this year. I don’t know if it work related or because my office was so screwed up for so long or what. I have been getting on less and less and even doing what I usually do less and less. I am still sucking at keeping my life organized. I am getting better, but there are blank pages in my day timer. There are things that need to be done and have not been. All I can keep doing is trying.
Back to events in 2011 – some other interesting things I have been involved in or noticed. There is a person from my past with whom I had a really close relationship to, but as things go, misunderstandings happen and it was interesting to note that at a recent get together, I spoke with everyone at that party except this person. Not a word was shared. Spoke to the significant other and had a great conversation. It was interesting. Also, I was actually in a situation I have never been in where a friend and I went for dinner which not uncommon, he decided to pay – this is also not uncommon for me or my friends – and then when we were talking afterwards, I honestly felt like I was expected to pay back the dinner with sex. I have honestly never been in that situation before. How uncomfortable and also detrimental to the relationship as I just am not 100% comfortable in this person presence. In a better situation, I have been trying to put myself out there to new people, including curling up against and putting my legs up on people I have just met. It was kinda nice to share a loveseat with two new people. I had some good flirting with new people as well as my usual flirt buddies.
Unfortunately, my harem has not been added to. I have actually felt like removing some potentials – I just think in this day and age, why do we play these games? If you are interested, then say you are. It doesn’t have to be all deep and spiritual, but it also could be all of that. Don’t be all hot and cold. Go with the flow and enjoy life. I am trying to be consistent and honest with myself. I got involved with two classes that embrace sensuality and being a woman. They were both fun and deep and brought about some good internal discussion and determination. I want to continue that feeling. I want to be out there and trying new things and experiencing life.
It is that balance of being a writer at heart, who also knows that in order to write, you need to live. While observation and vicariously living are fun and fascinating, the heart and mind learn better from experiencing. And that is my overall goal for the coming year(s).
To all my friends, thank you for another great year and cheers to a future full of promise and opportunity. Let’s hope for more fun, good times, cuddle piles, intimate conversations, opportunities to live and love and experience, new learning, good health, great friends – new and old, and adventure. Love you.
The office reno is complete. This is a very good thing. While there are still a few things that need to be added – upper cabinets – overall, I am very pleased to be able to use this room again.
The water seepage turned out to not be a horrible event. This was also very good. I was worried about how much we were going to have to spend/do in order to rectify this problem. But it was rather affordable and though it took up too much time, I am glad I can use the room and not have to devote thousands of dollars to redoing it. But… I am not putting the books back in until spring when I can confirm it has truly been fixed.
This means the other reno I wanted to do – the roof – was not done. But we found a really good company that we like and hopefully in 2012, we will complete this reno.
Work – I believe I told my boss this week that the only constant in my job right now is change. We are going through so much right now that I am just trying to hang on. I appreciated this past week and being able to get through some of my emails and start the training I need to get done. I just don’t understand where the higher-ups are coming from. I feel like they really have no clue. The training I need to do – I got access Dec 14, but not the software until the 15th. I was told on the 15 that this was not a priority for my boss, but I am supposed to be using the training on Jan 3rd. The first 2 courses took 2 hours each. The next two took an hour each. I have a total of 67 courses, which means I have 63 left. And these are just the basic training. There is another 20 or so courses I have to take afterwards. Oh My Goodness!
Plus – work is basically virtual. While my colleague is superb, I totally adore her and we get along; she is located elsewhere. It makes it tough being alone in the office. The boss is located elsewhere. This is new for me. I feel left out of my old unit since I no longer work with them. Plus, they are going through change. We are rather stressed out and burning out and I cannot do anything to help them anymore. I can’t do what I need to do.
Health-wise, 2011 was better than last year. I joined the pcn group and the good news is I am back doing what I wanted – losing weight and getting healthier. There have been ups and downs in this journey this year. I mostly like my dietician; we are similar in some aspects, but I still am not getting what I want out of her. The exercise specialist is good and is very excited for me. I get to start January with a circuit that he is creating. I am hoping that will help. I still love and hate the calorie counting. I get it; I really do. It is frustrating, annoying, and time consuming. I don’t have a phone with apps, which might make things easier. I do it in writing and search online for anything I can’t figure out. I am exercising regularly. I am making myself take breaks at work. I have lost thirty pounds and twelve and a half inches. That makes me very happy.
Medical wise – it has been a trying year for me. I have hurt myself pretty much every month. From dizziness at the start of the year to dislocating in September and then really bad scrapes and hurts in December. Thankfully, only September had me in the hospital, but oy! I seriously hurt each of my little toes this year, which has made shoes interesting. I have pulled my back and neck and I have tested my immune system often this year.
Following this though – I got my first professional massage this year and have continued with it. We have now moved from weekly to every three weeks and hopefully soon to once a month. I also got my first manicure and pedicure. While enjoyable, I was also annoyed with how much time I spent fixing things afterwards. My hands and feet and nails have benefited from the attention (and the paraffin and massage), so we’ll see if this becomes a regular event. Rumor has it we are doing this again in January.
Family – my brother and SIL are expecting. Whoot! First grandchild for my parents expected at the end of January. Still not feeling like I know her very well, which sucks. I really like and get along with my brother; so I assumed I would really like his wife. I wasn’t expecting best friends, but I was expecting friends. Instead, I don’t even know. I just don’t feel like she makes an effort and I am tired of dragging things out of her to try to learn about her. We’ll see if motherhood brings out the best in her, though based on her recent statements, I can see this not going well. My parents are doing better. They seem to be enjoying things for the most part. They have plans for travel, which hopefully will get them back in time for the birth of their grandchild. They are both working and while mom is scheduled for surgery in February, I am hoping everything goes well.
Friends – The drama, the excitement, the sadness, the love. There have been some breakups, some deaths, some happy events, and through it all, I am often reminded how good my friends are. I did get out more, at least, until I started calorie counting. That has hurt my involvement in things more than anything else. I have to be careful when I got out and where and what do I eat. I have made some good choices and some bad ones. It adds to the frustration and I get tired of explaining why I am not responding to dinner suggestions or why I seem to be busy.
I have still spent a majority of the year alone. As much as I try to get out, it is tough. There are friends I want to see more. There are friends who want to see me more. I have been horrible on email this year. I don’t know if it work related or because my office was so screwed up for so long or what. I have been getting on less and less and even doing what I usually do less and less. I am still sucking at keeping my life organized. I am getting better, but there are blank pages in my day timer. There are things that need to be done and have not been. All I can keep doing is trying.
Back to events in 2011 – some other interesting things I have been involved in or noticed. There is a person from my past with whom I had a really close relationship to, but as things go, misunderstandings happen and it was interesting to note that at a recent get together, I spoke with everyone at that party except this person. Not a word was shared. Spoke to the significant other and had a great conversation. It was interesting. Also, I was actually in a situation I have never been in where a friend and I went for dinner which not uncommon, he decided to pay – this is also not uncommon for me or my friends – and then when we were talking afterwards, I honestly felt like I was expected to pay back the dinner with sex. I have honestly never been in that situation before. How uncomfortable and also detrimental to the relationship as I just am not 100% comfortable in this person presence. In a better situation, I have been trying to put myself out there to new people, including curling up against and putting my legs up on people I have just met. It was kinda nice to share a loveseat with two new people. I had some good flirting with new people as well as my usual flirt buddies.
Unfortunately, my harem has not been added to. I have actually felt like removing some potentials – I just think in this day and age, why do we play these games? If you are interested, then say you are. It doesn’t have to be all deep and spiritual, but it also could be all of that. Don’t be all hot and cold. Go with the flow and enjoy life. I am trying to be consistent and honest with myself. I got involved with two classes that embrace sensuality and being a woman. They were both fun and deep and brought about some good internal discussion and determination. I want to continue that feeling. I want to be out there and trying new things and experiencing life.
It is that balance of being a writer at heart, who also knows that in order to write, you need to live. While observation and vicariously living are fun and fascinating, the heart and mind learn better from experiencing. And that is my overall goal for the coming year(s).
To all my friends, thank you for another great year and cheers to a future full of promise and opportunity. Let’s hope for more fun, good times, cuddle piles, intimate conversations, opportunities to live and love and experience, new learning, good health, great friends – new and old, and adventure. Love you.
Quote for 2011: 'There's no such thing as a bad idea...just poorly executed awesome ones.' - Damon Salvatore (Ian Somerhalder)
Labels: life
posted by Taryn at 3:57 pm
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