Friday, September 19, 2008

I’m changing my naughty ways. To naughtier ones.

One could say that I haven’t been blogging because I have been very busy living. Hmmm… well, one could say that. In reality, I have been quite irritated lately. As you already know, D and I have been in conflict for a while. We have our moments of goodness, but lately, I would say we are arguing as much or more than we are getting along. We are doing renos, which are stressful in their own right. Now add in two people and suddenly it becomes a battleground of dominance, preferences and attitudes. And don’t misread – I am at fault in this situation as well. Holidays are right around the corner and I am very much looking forward to it. I think things would be calmer at home though if we weren’t such opposites. When I am pissed at the contractors, D isn’t. When D is pissed at the contractors, I just want it all done. I hate to say it but I would not recommend my stucco/stone people. This reno was supposed to be done by June. It is now almost the end of September. Give me a break already. There is no reason for this. And it wouldn’t be so bad if they cleaned up, but these people have destroyed my yard. I don’t know if I can ever get the yards to recover without stripping both yards down to dirt and rebuilding. On the other hand, the spray insulation people were okay. They may have been a bit messy, but they kept their promises and were quite efficient. The lighting people were awesome! My light is in. Whoohoo! Now just a mailbox and an address sign. Not so lucky in those categories yet.

Then there is work. I am applying for another position in my department and they are questioning my experience. I wish I could videotape what I have been handling for the last few months, because I have been doing that position most of these past months while the person who is responsible sits back and relaxes. Goodness, I am so tired of doing so much more than I am required for my position. Can’t I take the tone “Not in my job description” like everyone else? And all the stress is causing me to be a bit bitchy at work. Fave coworker and I had another disagreement and I walked away, kinda huffy. He stopped by later and I told him we were good and was able to explain what I was trying in a much more coherent way, so both of us were happy in the end. He seemed a bit off today though, so I hope it has nothing to do with the disagreement. Heck, we’ve only had a confrontation a couple times so far. I think we are doing remarkably well as friends.

A third couple in our group has split. Thoughts go through my head at the same time I feel bad for them.

The cute guy (well, cutish) at work has left. There is no one to flirt with now from a distance. And just when he was showing some response. Sheesh!

S hasn’t written me since she moved to Ottawa. Guess she is too busy for lil ol’ me. Sighhhh. And another friend is leaving for Ottawa soon.

A lot of people at work are stressed and it is starting to strain everyone. I sometimes dread going into work. Sighhh.

I have just not been having the most consistent of days and then there is the election… I would rant about the carp involved in that, but I will wait another day. Again, it surprises me what we put up with in this country.

Labels:

Monday, September 01, 2008

Please put all criticisms in the form of a compliment.

Let’s review the last week…
Monday – it’s an okay day, but by mid afternoon, a migraine starts developing. Monday night is awful. As long as I lay horizontal, my head is fine, but as soon as I sit up or stand, it hurts and I am miserable. However, I am a woman, which means the world does NOT stop when I am not feeling well. So after the lovely J drops off some boxes, I pack the rest of the books so renos can soon begin. I go to bed early-ish.

Tuesday, due to issues at work, I go to work despite my aching head. The day is not good, but it’s been worse. Despite all this, I still go shopping at Michael’s (work project) and manage to do Yoga. Head feels a tiny less throbby.

Wednesday – again due to work issues, I go to work. My head is STILL aching. Fave co-worker is gone. Day is long. Here is the post I started to write:
Let’s talk about my life for a moment. You see, I am stressed. Everyone at work is, really. None of us really want to be here right now. The difference is they have work to keep them busy, while I…I have none. Oh, there is work I could do – mindless stuff or stuff for other people. Most of my job is spent waiting. Waiting for people to get me information, waiting for people to do their jobs so I can do mine, waiting for people to give me permission to continue, waiting for people to sign off my last project, waiting for people to start the meeting, waiting for the meeting to end.

My in box is pretty full – none of it can be completed as I am waiting for other people.

Waiting…there is a part of me that feels all I do is wait.


Come home to multiple people in my house, but soon there is only D, ndie and me. Ndie and D call the Hat who comes over to play games, while I sew my costume for the Betty Cup – I finish the costume that night. My back aches as does my head.

Thursday – I refuse to go to work. I wake at 4:30 am with spike driving into head, so I call work and decline to attend. Back to bed. Wake again at 11-ish. Feeling a bit better. D is off for the day and we had plans for the evening so when the throbbing has leveled off, we go off to the lighting store recommended by our contractor – because the contractor doesn’t like our current exterior lights. Parks Lighting was a waste for us. Lots of pretty things, little service and there are limits to what I will pay for a light that doesn’t do what my old one does. Off to WEM – BIG MISTAKE! I don’t know why more people aren't killed at WEM. The noise level is so horrendous, the throbbing in my head returns. I nearly take out several people who don’t know how to walk – WE ARE IN CANADA! – GET THE **&*^**^ ON THE RIGHT OF THE WALKWAYS!!!!! As you can tell my mood starts to deteriorate. Solution – food! At Olive Garden. It was okay – though he didn’t give us a second bowl of salad. I ate all my pasta – I was stuffed full – bad me! Then we hit Robinson Lighting. Jody was the nicest salesperson – he helped us immensely and I found a light I liked (D didn’t care) for a price I would pay. I refused the $250 blank address sign. Really – it was $250 for the sign, no numbers or letters (also it was more expensive than the light). Holy carp! D found a lovely faucet for the kitchen – D asked a sales lady if the price included the sink – it was $900 for just the faucet. Then the tub D liked was $8400. And D thinks my tastes are expensive?!?

Friday – woke up with dull throbbing. Fave coworker is back and amazed at how miserable I am. By the afternoon, (fave coworker left early), we had a minor crisis. Despite this, my mood gets better and by the time I leave, my headache is gone and I am seriously happy. I maintain the mood until D gets home and take out the day’s stresses on me. Mood plummets and the atmosphere for the weekend is set.

Saturday – Betty Cup – things go well, despite my sudden inability to play a decent game of croquet. I try to talk with C who is having a very hermitty summer. A (of A&S) comes in and we have a great conversation. However, other conversations don’t go so well. D does not win this year, so I will have to fill the now empty space on the mantel. Starving by the time we leave, so I make a small dinner and D and I watch a movie.

Sunday – D and I have very hostile fight about the renos. Then off to the Social Event of the Season. Again, I have a lovely time with lots of conversation. Again, starving when we leave, so I make a small dinner and D and I watch movies.

Monday – I am up earlier than D (as usual) and proceed to start on the list of to do’s. There is a lot to do to get the house ready for renos and autumn. D wakes up really late and we have a very hostile fight about the renos. Again. My allergies act up and I am forced to leave the basement to go work outside with my other allergies and the nasty wasps. When I come back in, D acts as everything is okay (as usual) and continues the reno project. Meanwhile, I cook supper, shell beans (I shell the older beans from the vine to dry for seeds for next year) and then make the menu plan and grocery list, followed by dishes. The Lovely J comes by and drops off the borrowed lawn mower and after watching us eat (she had already eaten –sorry!), she very nicely helped D with the renos. Which brings us to about an hour ago when the lovely J left, D returned to the basement for clean up duty and I finished the dishes and am now trying to calm my mood by playing on the computer. I am tired. I want to stuff my face with food. And I feel miserable. My chest hurts, though the Reactine has kicked in so at least I am not sniffling constantly. I feel hopeless, despondent and very much in the depths of despair.

And that was the week update. Aren’t you glad I shared? :)

Labels: ,